Wednesday, December 18, 2013

My stated sandwich agenda is the same as my subliminal one

Somewhere on the planet Earth at this very moment, a sandwich is being born.

And this is an amazing thing, because sandwiches are the perfect foods. Without a doubt, you can't go wrong with a sandwich.

Now, you may wonder: why sandwiches?

Don't fret, I'll tell you. You see, a sandwich is portable and handheld. It can be any combination or configuration of foods, for better or for worse, between two pieces of bread or whatever.

Wait. "Whatever?"

I remember a sandwich that had two fried chicken breasts as the bun. Or another that used a donut, or a patty melt that used two grilled cheese sandwiches as the bun. Yeah, it happened.

Can't understand why you would want to get rid of regular bread, aside from maybe a gluten allergy. Or maybe you're on one of those carb-free diets, which sucks because you can't eat sandwiches. But I'm wavering from the point.

Heart attacks probably will put a stop to this activity.

Everybody, everywhere, who ate one of those chicken-bun sandwiches will probably get a clogged artery and kick the bucket. I don't have the exact figures on cholesterol content, but I'm sure I'm right.

So yeah.

Really, though, besides all that business, you are always on a path to victory with these open-source culinary delights. They make great party snacks, or quick meals.

Under a blue sky? Take a sandwich and have a picnic. Indoors? Sandwiches work there as well.

Legends of sandwiches will outlive all of us. Scholars from the future will look back on us and call us the "Sandwich Age." We will be the wise philosophers of old, to a future age, because we made food better!

Except for the chicken-bun sandwiches. I really hope history disregards those.

Sunday, October 27, 2013

COMIC: Non-Bitstrips

So there's this thing called Bitstrips that's currently making the rounds as the latest Facebook fad. It basically allows users to create comic strips about themselves and their friends, without actually drawing anything.

It's a neat concept, but since I draw those types of comics anyway, I thought I'd make my own:




Friday, September 27, 2013

Yollam & Sage: The Case of the Raptured Band, Part 2

When we last left off: A rock band, the Calendar Squirrels, has disappeared, leaving behind their clothes. Were they raptured, or did they stage an alien abduction? Intrepid photographer Ralph Yollam is working with a mysterious private eye named L. Sage to learn the truth...

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Fluxing AWESOME

So I ordered a flux capacitor patch off of BTTF.net, because (as I often say, and as everyone already knows) Back to the Future is my favorite movie series, and the proceeds would go toward restoring the original "A" car DeLorean from Part I.

Which is a nice thing to do.

I'd heard that BTTF writer/producer Bob Gale had signed a few of these patches way back when, but I only ordered mine a couple of weeks ago, and I thought that surely, SURELY at this late date, I wouldn't get an autographed one.

Well, I got this package in the mail today:


And holy moley, that's got the signature of the man who co-wrote my favorite movie.

I mean, whoa.

The best part is, I just came off of a massive trilogy binge this weekend. I'd had waaaaaaay too much caffeine, so I stayed up and watched all three movies, back to back to back, until four in the morning. Just 'cause.

Anyway, I'm going to sit here and revel in the awesomeness. I'm thinking about putting this in my safety deposit box, or even behind a frame. Because yeah.

Or it could share space with the poster on my wall...


Get back, Marty.